C. H. D. Awareness week

I just found out that Feb. 7-14th is Congenital Heart Defect awareness week! Seems fitting after my previous post about church last week! Thank you God for our little girl.

Early mornings

Anyone who knows me, knows I am anything but a morning person!! However, since having these two precious little people, it makes getting up a little bit easier. I took this picture after Crawford had finished his breathing treatment, which he has to do twice a day, every day. Gwen had just woke up for the day and it is so sweet how excited they get to see each other. I also took the picture to send to Nathan because he has been traveling more and not at home as much to help. I am beyond thankful for his job and that he is actually liking what he's doing because he didn't for so long. This does make for more difficult mornings with trying to get me ready for work and then get the two kiddos ready. Actually, that's kind of a lie, I don't have to get Gwen ready to go because she gets to stay home with Grandma, which we are so thankful for. I have always been so thankful for Nathan, but have honestly taken him for granted more than I should. He does so much for our family and is such an involved and hands-on dad that God has blessed our family with. This has become even more apparent to me since he's gone in the mornings now. We work so well together as a team and I just miss him when he's not there. Not just to help with the kiddos, but to share the moments with. Sappy I know!!
On another note, Crawford is not a morning person like his mommy and Gwennie is just like her daddy, up and at 'em!

A DIVINE meeting

A divine meeting 2/3/2013

I have to write about this because one day I want to look  back at it and remember this when I ever question if God is in control.  we have been going to Westover Hills Church of Christ now for a couple of months, after not ever really feeling "at home" at our previous church.  It wasn't one specific thing and we did like the pastor, it just didn't click.  We both feel comfortable at Westover and Crawford really enjoys going to Sunday school there.  Another added benefit is we get to see Oma and Granddaddy, which we all love.  

Back track a little bit to last September, when we first found out about Gwen's heart condition, Oma gave my name and number to a woman who goes to Westover. The woman's daughter had open heart surgery to repair a whole she had in her  heart when she was about four.  We talked on the phone for almost two hours, but haven't spoken since.  She helped me so much because she knew exactly what I was feeling and talked me through everything from anger and sadness to hope and faith.  She also told me how well her daughter is doing now at the age of 7, and that she is a very spiritual little girl, who God is using in great ways.  

So... back to today! When it was time to leave for church today, Gwen was still sleeping so my Grandma Sarah said that Gwen could just stay home with her.  I debated back and forth about waking her, but you know the saying, 'never wake a sleeping baby!'  All of this to say that we had to leave AS SOON AS CHURCH was over to get back in time for Grandma to go to church.  I had left right after church to go pick Crawford up from Sunday school and Nathan said he would go get the car and meet us where we usually park.  Crawford and I hurried and walked out to the parking lot and after not finding Nathan I called him (frustrated to say the least!). He said he was on the OTHER side of the parking lot and then said he had texted me to tell me this.  I hadn't received any text so I naturally thought he was saying this to keep himself out of trouble! We later found out that Nathan had sent a text, but it wasn't to me, it was to his friend Shawn (I'm sure Shawn was a little confused when he got that one!).  As Crawford and I were walking across the parking lot, he said he had to go to the bathroom.  Seriously?! Right this second?! He said he would just go outside (thanks Papa), but I told him we were going to have to go back inside.  I'm not going to lie, I did think maybe we could go behind the building and no one would see. Fortunately my better judgement won out and we went inside.  When we got back inside I carried Crawford to the restroom (because his little legs couldn't go fast enough) and right as I was about to go in a little girl stepped in front of us so we had to move out of the way for her to open the door.  Crawford went and did his business, all the while, I was still frustrated with Nathan and the whole situation.  Nothing seemed to be going the way I wanted it to!! When we went to wash our hands, the little girl who opened the door for us was standing there as well.  She said, "Hi, what's your name?" I told her, and I am embarrassed to say, not in the nicest way.  Not mean of course, but more of I am in a super hurry and I don't have time for chit-chat.  Boy did God have another plan though!  I asked what her name was and when she first told me, I had a hard time understanding, but then the speech therapist in me realized she had a lisp, and it clicked. This was the little girl who had the same heart condition as Gwen!! It stopped me in my tracks because I had prayed for her, her mom had prayed with me over the phone for my daughter, and here she was.  She looked so healthy and happy! I told her that I had talked to her mom about her because my daughter Gwen was also born with holes in her heart.  She said "I just had one big one! Does your daughter have more than one?" I told her yes and that we would have to have it repaired in about a year and a half.  She said, "it will all be ok and I will pray for her." I just started crying and couldn't hold it in.  God KNEW I needed to meet her, and hear what she had to say, at THAT moment.  Just a few minutes before I sat in church praying for my little girl and wondered how things would turn out (in other words, trying to not worry and have faith, something I've been struggling with lately). I realize we still don't know, but it was like God was saying,"why do you doubt me and why are you afraid? Gwen will be fine, but until then stay faithful and she too will be a happy healthy little girl soon.".   I never saw the little girl's mom and I don't know how to get a hold of her now, but I want to tell her that she and her daughter both have touched me, and that yes, like she said God is using her daughter for GREAT things!!  It gave me such a peace in the one minute exchange, and reminded me that I don't need to worry or be scared; God has a plan. Something I need to remember everyday, in everything.  So next time Crawford says he has to go to the bathroom, I'll be happy to take him because you never know when or where God might be giving you what you need!

I'm sorry this is so long, but I want to remember how many things had to happen for me to be in the bathroom at the same time as that precious little girl, and for God to use her to speak to me at that moment.  

Jeremiah 29:11 and Isaiah 41:10 came to mind through all of this!!  

November 2012

Oh my goodness it has been way too long! There has been so much happen since I last posted that I don't think I could even fit it in one post, even if I tried. A short synopsis, I was pregnant for 9 months and had a baby girl, Gwenyth Elise Mattox on June 11th, 2012.  She is so precious and lots of fun.  The big thing with her is that we found out she has multiple atrial septal defects, (click here for an explanation) which means she has multiple holes in the atrium of her heart.  We found out August 29th, after she went to her two month old appointment and the pediatrician heard a heart murmur.

This is a picture of her the afternoon we found out... As you can see though, she's not too bothered about this whole thing!

I remember this afternoon like it was yesterday and so many things kept running through my mind, but this is also one of them,  and it gave me peace then, and still continues to.

To say that we were shocked, devastated, confused, scared, and/or hopeful would be an understatement.  We have definitely had time to come to grips with this and Gwen is doing well right now, so we are very thankful for this.  She was also approved for a Synagis shot, which is kind of like a vaccination for RSV.  This is a VERY expensive shot, so I am so thankful that she was approved and even more thankful that we don't have a copay for this.  Since this isn't a vaccination she has to get a shot once a month, which we had our first one in October, and go back for our next one on November 19th.  We will be going back to the cardiologist after Thanksgiving and I'm not expecting a change, but I hope that he will be pleased with her growth, which is one of the concerns with this condition. We call her "Chunky Monkey" and poor girl got mommy's cheeks and thighs!

January 2013

Update from the above post...We went to the cardiologist and Gwen is doing great! The dr still heard the murmur, which was expected, but did say he is very pleased with her growth.  He also said that she doesn't look like a "heart" baby and that we don't have to go back until June, when Gwen is one.
At that time the dr will do another echo-cardiogram to see if there are still holes, how many there are, and the size of them. He did say though, to continue to think that she will need to have these repaired when she's two, which will first involve a catheter procedure.  If they aren't able to repair them that way, she will require open heart surgery.  This is something that is difficult for me to think about, so we are just continuing with prayers of healing.
My 7 month old with two teeth (but still not wanting to eat!)

As you can see, no problems here with growth, which I am so thankful for!  If I could just get her to eat some solid foods, we'd be good.  She acts like I'm trying to give her lemons, and then squeezes her lips together and won't budge.  We can tell that we are going to have an opinionated, independent, and strong-willed little girl on our hands.  She is already "bossing" everyone around!  But how can you say no to this face?!

On to this little girl's handsome brother!  I cannot believe that he is 3 1/2 years old! He is turning in to such an amazing little person, who is also the best big brother any little girl could ask for.  He loves her so much, and tells us that regularly, which of course makes my heart melt!

He also loves to be silly, which is good for me because I'm not naturally "silly" and I love that he brings that out in me.

This picture was taken at his allergy Dr's office.  He now has to get allergy shots 2-3 times a week, which he has become a CHAMP at.  Again, I'm so proud of him!!  He handles it way better than his bullriding daddy :) We also found out that he is allergic to soy and have since had to completely change his diet.  This has made such a difference in how he feels, which means that he eats more, has more energy, and is generally in a better mood because he doesn't feel bad all the time.  It was so hard having him feel bad all the time and always complaining of his stomach hurting.  I thought for a long time that he was just saying it to get out of eating, but the day he turned down the cookie at the grocery store because he said it hurt his stomach, I knew something more was wrong.  It's amazing to find out how much they put soy in!!  He has learned to ask me before he eats something if it has soy in it, which also tells me that he can tell a difference when he eats it.
He also LOVES to play baseball, and I realize I'm a little bit partial, but he has a pretty good swing and loves to hit them over the fence and go get them.  His daddy and Papa have become pretty good pitchers too since he has them play all the time.  Crawford wakes up wanting to play and goes to bed wanting to play baseball!!

He said he wants to be a fire fighting - baseball player!! I've told him he can be anything he wants to be! :)

I am definitely going to be better about keeping up this blog, because I love looking back at it and want to be able to have these memories.

Stationery card

Modern Hello Girl Birth Announcement

To see Shutterfly's birth announcement designs, click here.

View the entire collection of cards.

An almost 6 month over due update!!

First hair cut by Daddy

We figured we could save some money and time by having Nathan cut Crawford's hair at home. It only made sense, since Nathan was the rodeo team's resident barber!